May: not a happy month for me...
May. 1st, 2008 12:22 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
raloriaIt's May 1st now. Spring, sunshine, flowers....all that good stuff, right? Not for me.
I'm feeling kind of down right now. I really haven't felt like doing much of anything. Couldn't even get myself to answer some comments even though I know I need to. I've been very sensitive and emotional today (well, yesterday if you're being technical)...crying off and on all day. It all comes down to the 2 year anniversary of my dad's death coming up in about 2 weeks. It's weird how I always get upset in the days before the event, but not on the day itself. So my emotions have been all over the place lately.
I was touched...truly, by your outpouring of love to my "Defriending Amnesty" post the other night. Apparently I scared everyone into thinking I was cutting people. That's not the case at all. I was just giving people who wanted to defriend me, the opportunity to do so without any questions or hurt feelings. I'm relieved (and kind of surprised) to say that nobody has defriended me in response to that post. All of you, a few lurkers included, said such wonderful things and I kind of feel embarrassed by all the attention. I want to thank all of you. I'm lucky and blessed to have you on my flist. *HUGS*
Meanwhile, realizing it's May 1st has made me sad for another reason. I've mentioned my cats to a few of you. I used to have two...one black & white female named Frisky and a black male named Blackie. They've both been dead for several years now. May 1st is sort of Frisky's birthday (since we never knew exactly when she was born). She was my baby, raised from 6 weeks old. Even after she grew up she was always small and dainty. My parents and I always said Frisky was the lady and Blackie was the brute aka "Miss Goodytwoshoes & the Filthy Beast" for those of you who've ever seen the Cary Grant film "Father Goose". She loved to hunt bugs, watch birds outside in our backyard, and play chase/attack games with me. She was not, however, a lap cat. She hated being held, though she loved to be petted. She sadly died back in 2000.
This is Frisky at her favorite spot: by the patio door, looking out at the backyard.
I found Blackie as a stray in our neighborhood in 1988. He was starving and very sick, with what we later learned was pneumonia. After being unable to find his owner we adopted him and gave him a happy life. He quickly turned from a scrawny, dirty cat into a muscular one with a shiny black coat. Always ready for some kind of mischief, he managed to get into some troublesome situations over the years, but he always survived them all. Right away he caused some trouble in the house because Frisky took an instant disliking to him. We tried our best to make them get along, but she was very stubborn. She was queen of the house, and this renegade male was invading her turf. Blackie, on the other hand, liked her...perhaps too much. He'd get close, she'd run or attack, and soon we'd have a full-blown fight on our hands. Luckily, most of the time they kept their distance from each other and lived peaceably. Blackie loved to climb things and was always searching the house for higher places to be. Unlike Frisky, he did enjoy being held and liked being a lap kitty, too, especially in his older years. Blackie had to be put down back in 2005.
This is Blackie in one of his favorite pastimes, enjoying the warm sunshine on the living room floor.
I miss my kitties. They were special friends and I still miss their presence in the house. Hope you enjoy the photos. They're scans from prints I have by my bed, so the quality isn't the greatest. But I'm happy to finally share photos of them with all of you. It's something I've been meaning to do for a while now.
So I hope this explains my gloominess. It's likely to continue until I'm past the day of my dad's death. I never know when or how severely it's going to effect me. It just appears out of nowhere. Doesn't help that the weather today was less than spring-like....overcast and raining. Not that sunshine would really help....it was beautiful and warm the week my dad passed away. Too many memories...I've been thinking about them a lot lately. There very well may be other posts about this as the days go on. Somehow, talking about my feelings here on LJ does help me. I thank you all for being a welcoming ear to listen to my ramblings.
I'll keep this post public for a few days and then F Lock it to protect my personal photos.
I'm feeling kind of down right now. I really haven't felt like doing much of anything. Couldn't even get myself to answer some comments even though I know I need to. I've been very sensitive and emotional today (well, yesterday if you're being technical)...crying off and on all day. It all comes down to the 2 year anniversary of my dad's death coming up in about 2 weeks. It's weird how I always get upset in the days before the event, but not on the day itself. So my emotions have been all over the place lately.
I was touched...truly, by your outpouring of love to my "Defriending Amnesty" post the other night. Apparently I scared everyone into thinking I was cutting people. That's not the case at all. I was just giving people who wanted to defriend me, the opportunity to do so without any questions or hurt feelings. I'm relieved (and kind of surprised) to say that nobody has defriended me in response to that post. All of you, a few lurkers included, said such wonderful things and I kind of feel embarrassed by all the attention. I want to thank all of you. I'm lucky and blessed to have you on my flist. *HUGS*
Meanwhile, realizing it's May 1st has made me sad for another reason. I've mentioned my cats to a few of you. I used to have two...one black & white female named Frisky and a black male named Blackie. They've both been dead for several years now. May 1st is sort of Frisky's birthday (since we never knew exactly when she was born). She was my baby, raised from 6 weeks old. Even after she grew up she was always small and dainty. My parents and I always said Frisky was the lady and Blackie was the brute aka "Miss Goodytwoshoes & the Filthy Beast" for those of you who've ever seen the Cary Grant film "Father Goose". She loved to hunt bugs, watch birds outside in our backyard, and play chase/attack games with me. She was not, however, a lap cat. She hated being held, though she loved to be petted. She sadly died back in 2000.
This is Frisky at her favorite spot: by the patio door, looking out at the backyard.
I found Blackie as a stray in our neighborhood in 1988. He was starving and very sick, with what we later learned was pneumonia. After being unable to find his owner we adopted him and gave him a happy life. He quickly turned from a scrawny, dirty cat into a muscular one with a shiny black coat. Always ready for some kind of mischief, he managed to get into some troublesome situations over the years, but he always survived them all. Right away he caused some trouble in the house because Frisky took an instant disliking to him. We tried our best to make them get along, but she was very stubborn. She was queen of the house, and this renegade male was invading her turf. Blackie, on the other hand, liked her...perhaps too much. He'd get close, she'd run or attack, and soon we'd have a full-blown fight on our hands. Luckily, most of the time they kept their distance from each other and lived peaceably. Blackie loved to climb things and was always searching the house for higher places to be. Unlike Frisky, he did enjoy being held and liked being a lap kitty, too, especially in his older years. Blackie had to be put down back in 2005.
This is Blackie in one of his favorite pastimes, enjoying the warm sunshine on the living room floor.
I miss my kitties. They were special friends and I still miss their presence in the house. Hope you enjoy the photos. They're scans from prints I have by my bed, so the quality isn't the greatest. But I'm happy to finally share photos of them with all of you. It's something I've been meaning to do for a while now.
So I hope this explains my gloominess. It's likely to continue until I'm past the day of my dad's death. I never know when or how severely it's going to effect me. It just appears out of nowhere. Doesn't help that the weather today was less than spring-like....overcast and raining. Not that sunshine would really help....it was beautiful and warm the week my dad passed away. Too many memories...I've been thinking about them a lot lately. There very well may be other posts about this as the days go on. Somehow, talking about my feelings here on LJ does help me. I thank you all for being a welcoming ear to listen to my ramblings.
I'll keep this post public for a few days and then F Lock it to protect my personal photos.
