raloria

I got to bed late, reading all of you many emails and PM (Thank You!!!!!), and got a PM from

deansdemongirl before I got off the computer. Fearing the worst, I went to bed without reading it. I was already upset and stressed out, I didn't need more bad news to make me feel worse. Even so, I had a hard time going to sleep, my thoughts of what was to come filling my head.

After 4 hours of sleep I came back online to face the music.

Keep in mind that she sent me a series of PMs - but this is what it started with today.
The text in Red is from my response to her from last night.

Hi raloria,

Excuse me, but I do not owe you $100.

First of all, I'm offended by your actions. Instead of simply asking me to remove the video from SendSpace (which I would have gladly done) you went directly into attack mode. You accused me of being a thief (which I resent), reported me to SendSpace, and are now seeking money from me for something that was not my fault.

First off you didn't bother to come and ask ME if you could upload MY video so why on earth should I have to ask you to take it down? If you want common courtesy, you first have to give it or earn it.

Attending Comic Con where I took the video cost me money.

As for it not being your fault, that is a cop out. You are an adult and you are well aware of the rules of copyright and ownership. So unless someone put a gun to your head and forced you to upload a video that does not belong to you without first asking permission from the person who does own it then to claim you have no fault or responsibility for your actions actions is not acting like an adult.

I explained on my post how I tried to track down where I got the video download from. I was not the one who stole your video in the first place. I should not be punished for the actions of another.

Yes I did go after them and all their files and screen caps have been removed as far as I know.

And perhaps it would have been more polite on your part to try and track down the owner of the video and get crediting/posting permission BEFORE you did it. I mean if you found a stolen car and then got caught driving it do you think the owner would accept the excuse that you were going to credit them for being the original owner?

I'd also like to know how you can claim that video as your own? How do I know it's yours? The name of the poster on the site is Ladytalon. That could be anyone.

Ladytalon is the user name I had for my TVG online Blog. Ask anyone and they will tell you that Ladytalon is M R Reed. Plus ask the Danneelfans LJ they know I posted screen caps from the video months ago to their site. I was using an icon photo from that video for months. It's the one in this response.

Speaking of money....I see after 7 days and over 500 viewings of the video on your site that you've made less than 5 dollars. My file on SendSpace was only downloaded around 30 times. That hardly equates to $100.

Then you owe me $15 and we can call it even.

You should know by now that open distribution of online material is a fact of life, despite copyright laws.

No it it is not a fact of life. It is against the law and it is bad behavior from people who think they have the right to take whatever they want without respect to others. You always struck me as better than that.

The reason I reported you to sendspace instead of asking you was to prove that it is not 'a fact of life' and that there are consequences to taking things from other people without asking. If everyone started coming into people's homes and stealing whatever they wanted would you call that 'a fact of life' and do the same and be angry when you got caught?

I am sorry I came on so harsh. I did amend my postings to make it clear that I felt you didn't know the video you copied had been taken without permission.

I will be keeping you on my friends list because I like your writing and I like you. I think you are basically a good person. I just hope that maybe you will learn from this and maybe have a bit more respect for what belongs to other people. It's not all that hard to ASK first for permission and treat others with respect for what belongs to them.

Needless to say, this did not make me feel any better. She was still blaming me, even though I tried to explain my side of things. I don't understand her stubbornness over copyright law online. She seems determined to stay strict in her beliefs despite what the rest of us are doing and find acceptable online and in LJ.

Love how she continues to attack me and say I'm not an adult by my actions (and her actions prove that she's acting like one?)....and yet....she won't take me off her friends list. Gah!

I don't know how many times I told her that I TRIED to find the original owner of that video. And yet, here she continues to accuse me of not looking. I'm very thorough in my online searches and I looked! How was I to be expected to find something that didn't exist anymore?

And I still resent that she was trying to shock me into learning a lesson.

This was her next message, about a half hour later...

You do know that I am a professional journalist right? That those videos and articles are my livelihood and how I make my living?

I thought you knew that and understood that is why I would be asking for monetary compensation from you.

I wasn't just some fan posting something.

That's why I am so upset about the video being stolen or reposted by anyone. I have bills to pay and I need the money to pay them.

You wouldn't like if someone came to your job and did it for free so that your boss didn't have to pay you right?

I still don't understand how my posting the video on SendSpace took anything away from her. It was up there for what? A day? It's not as if her video disappeared from her own site. Then I would understand. But it's been there this whole time.

And again....since the video has earned her less than 5 dollars so far...how is she earning anything from it? *iz baffled*

But let's move on...

Another half hour and I received this message from her...

Raloria:

I thought you had seen my response postings to the original message on the Dean_Sam community where the first upload was posted and that you were blatantly disregarding my concerns and my wishes by posting the video on sendspace.

That is part of the reason why I was so angry. That's why I posted that your upload was removed just like the other one was.

But in PM with your friend Kerrianne I am realizing that the thread was deleted, which I didn't know had happened and that it's quite possible you never saw it or my concerns or wishes about the video.

If this is true than I sincerely apologize for coming on so strong in my postings and such. I still stand by my belief that you should have tried to contact me or put out a posting asking if anyone knew where the original link was BEFORE you uploaded the video but now I realize you may not have had any knowledge of my feelings, concerns or wishes about this.

Okay, we've made progress here. She releases the post at

dean_sam was deleted and therefore I couldn't find it when seeking out the owner and poster of the video. She even apologizes for jumping the gun and attacking me without learning the whole story.

However...

She still thinks I should have tried to contact her first before posting the video. Uh, huh. A little difficult to do, when you have no idea who posted it. And truthfully, I've posted other things in this fashion when I don't know who to credit. I post the item and say I don't know where I got it, but hope the person responsible or someone will be able to tell me. I've never had an issue with it before. I honestly didn't think that I was going to have so much trouble over posting that video. I was just doing something nice for others.

An hour later, she sends me the following link.

http://deansdemongirl.livejournal.com/21129.html

You can check out her final response there.

So it seems the matter is now closed. I haven't responded to her yet, but I will once I figure out what to say. I'm still kind of reeling from this whole thing. She overreacted so badly. I hope she's the one to learn a lesson from this - like never assume and always get all your facts first. Those would be two good places to start. Again, I stress that if she had only contacted me in a sane manner when she first saw my post, we could have avoided this whole disaster.

I know she doesn't say so, but I sincerely hope she's not expecting that $15 from me.
'Cause no way is she even getting that amount.

I'm glad this is all over, but in a way I still feel scarred. Her apologies can't fix the stress she caused me. I know time will heal me, but I still feel like some kind of trust has been lost or something. I'm not going to feel entirely safe posting things anymore, but I know it won't keep me sharing posting videos, etc on my LJ.

A few of you thought I should go Friends Only because of this mess. But I don't want to do that. I enjoy sharing things with others and that would close me off from too many people. The caps, fanart, etc. that I post are meant to be seen by anyone. I want them out there in the big internet world, being enjoyed by as many people as possible. So I will not be going Friends Only as long as I still have things to share.

I can't thank you all enough for your support and offers of help during all this. So many of your comments and Personal Messages touched my heart, even made me cry, but most all kept me going. I even got help from people I didn't know, as they defended me against her accusations and attacks. It's all been so overwhelming and I'm grateful to have you all in my corner to back me up. It just proves I have the Best Flist Ever!

Thank you for all that you've done! *Biggest Group Hug Ever* :D